Last Memories of My Mom and Dad

"Forever Young"

My Mom and Dad
Picture made in 1939,
about the time they married.

Beth's recent e-mail to us about nursing home residents brought back memories of my father. He was living at home but not well, mentally or physically. Then his wife discovered that she had terminal cancer and went to live with her sister so that she would have someone to care for her. My father went to a nursing home in Oxford. He was in his early 80's.

The nursing home was the sadest place I have ever been in. Daddy said that all of them were put there to wait to die. He said it was a warehouse. He had stopped smoking, but started again. He opened himself a charge account at a drug store across the street and had cigarettes delivered.

I would visit and find him buzzing around in his wheelchair, teasing the other residents. He would make me lie down on his bed to rest as it had not been long since my heart surgery. He was still trying to take care of his little girl who could not help him in this sadest and last period of his life. My last visit to the nursing home was to accompany him to the hospital where he spent his last days.

Fast forward several more years, my mom was in the hospital in Meridian after a stroke. She was unable to talk, walk or move her right side. My mom had always been very reserve and distant with her affection. No hugs except when saying goodbye. During her last days, I gave her what I had needed to get all my life – lots of hugs, kisses and touching. I told her over and over that I loved her. I will never forget the long periods she spent looking into my eyes. They say that a mother bonds with her baby while looking deeply into their eyes. That’s what we did during her last days.

One afternoon, the nurses propped her up in a chair. She dozed. Again, I went to sleep in a parent’s hospital bed, holding her hand. We were so hopeful for her to get better, but it was not to be. Within about a week, God kissed her with his mercy and took her to himself.